Top Reasons Internet Porn is Better than Strip Clubs

1. Norton Internet Security clears viruses without embarrassing antibiotic pick-ups
2. Keyboard drawers provide a physical-stop preventing over extension of the elbow
3. “No Touching” rule holds no jurisdiction within my WiFi network
4. $60 Broadband is less costly than dollar-tucking the drawers of Daddy’s Little Disappointment
5. There’s no weird looking sauces on the buffet at home
6. I’ve finally seen the last of Toofless Taffy, the Wednesday matinee stripper
7. PC never kicks me in the face for sticking my finger in its USB port
8. The only bouncer at Bargain Babe’s Online is Time Warner
9. There’s never a “Dressed Code” where the Android roams
10. As Seen on TV! USB Powered Monitor Wiper Blade